Britney Spears and Kevin Federline will come together one more time to tell the public that they never made a sex tape. Reps from the divorcing couple say that both Britney and Kevin want to put an end to rumors that Kevin Federline is out peddling a sex tape.
They have agreed to jointly issue a statement, hoping to put an end to the flurry of stories that such a tape exists.
Just when we thought it was safe to finally stop thinking about the newly single Britney Spears for a few hours and watch the election returns, an IM from one of our porn-surfing spies arrived, directing us to a clip claiming to be the "Britney Spears & K-Fed Sex Tape," a 19-second scene starring what appears to be Spears herself (or a pretty good Spears-a-like—it still looks like her, even after dozens and dozens of viewings) enthusiastically administering a hearty hummer to her unseen then-househusband. Given the timing of the appearance of the footage, we assume that it's a highlight from the divorcing couple's rumored connubial sex production that a judge today ruled couldn't possibly hurt Spears' reputation, given that the pop-tartlet's brand is built on openly trading on her "modern sexuality." We may wake up to an inbox full of debunking messages, but for now, the video's conspicuously prominent title makes us think that we might soon be introduced to a website (like this one) hawking a product that finally shows us what Chaotic could have been had talent-hostile UPN not shortsightedly prevented the duo from thoroughly exploring the erotic possibilities of their handheld camerawork.